Friday, 15 November 2013

Lucky Me!

Bless him! P, the builder, dropped round this afternoon. He's re-jigging his garden and has some surplus fruit bushes looking for a new, happy home. He thought of me :) How lucky is that?

White currants, redcurrants, blackcurrants, gooseberries, apricots, apples, plums - the list seems endless. These are all in addition to the fig he gave me earlier this year. He wouldn't take a penny for them so I've promised him the first pot of jam - well, the second actually since the first is always a disaster for me and fit only for pouring on pancakes (yummy).

Everything is establishing itself and growing - the peas and beans are shooting so I'll have to keep an eye on them; the hollyhocks have seeded and one of the cauliflowers has taken too. I'm doing successional sowing of the veg so next month I'll plant two more of each variety and nurture them through the Winter ready for planting out, well-established, when the frosts have fled next Spring.

One thing has dawned on me: I'll really have to think about buying another freezer and re-arranging the dining room - well, it's called a dining room because now that the carpets are finally laid I'll have  a dining table (extends to ten in the hope of grandchildren), six chairs and a sideboard, bookshelves & display cabinet in there but, in reality, I may as well sell the table and chairs and install a greenhouse and a bit of hydroponics instead. My eldest left on Tuesday to marry and live in America (another story) so the likelihood of me seeing him, his lovely girl or any sprogs again seems remote.  The only things I need in the dining room at the moment are the bookshelves since family meals seem to be a thing of the past.  I'm not inclined to share Suki's food any more than he's inclined to share mine (strange cat). I once had a cat (my Jazz) who loved everything except veg and fruit but when it came to potatoes, custard, curry, baked beans, you name it - he ate it.  He died last year at the age of nineteen and I still miss him - best cat ever.  I've also known Puss-Puss, Geronimo, Mishy, Samba, Bo, Chillum and several un-named rescues who went on to be re-homed.  At a pinch you could call me CatWoman.

The central heating works! There was an over-ride switch not detailed in the how-to manual.  Unfortunately, I now can't switch it off so have turned the thermostat down to the lowest possible setting and hope that does the trick.  I bet that boiler's confused!  I'm one of those annoying people who hates being enclosed and prefers windows and doors wide open - anything else seems like a prison.  I have a halogen heater for the evenings if it's needed and it gives light as well as heat so I should be a not-too-miffed bunny when the gas bill finally comes in.

British Gas have actually been a waste of space. I've given up phoning them now because it's been six months since I first phoned with the gas meter reading yet they still insist on sending me bills only for electricity.  Lord knows what the bill will be when it finally gets here.  The last rolled-out letter I had from them was addressed to a 'Shelly xxxxx'.  I ask you, do I look like a Shelly?

I've also attempted to pay Council Tax but apparently the last owners haven't notified 'The Authoritays' so I can't because it's all subject to a data protection act (really?) .  All these cock-ups 'twixt Council and British Gas will eventually land on my doorstep and, I have to say, I'm not looking forward to it.

On another subject, who needs drugs? TV will fulfill all your needs, if you let it, and copious amounts of freely available alcohol, cannabis, ecstasy, cocaine, heroin ensure that a government has a population just where they want it: living on benefits, half-witted, semi-comatose and unable to fight back against injustice.

Here's Suki snoozing in front of my halogen heater and surrounded by my latest bout of unpacking:

By the way, have you seen these?

As usual, please click to enlarge.

I don't know if I'm talking to myself or not so here's something for me, to keep me going amidst the chaos:

Monday, 14 October 2013

Coming Soon!

I'm sorry for the sparse posts - put it down to an electricity 'outtage' caused by a blown pc (Suki managed to pee on it, perhaps he objected to all those photos of him sleeping rather than pulling his weight), a crashing laptop and a lack of will to take the latest photos of the debacle that is my 'garden'. I've now bought an Acer Chromebook; it was the only 'laptop' below £400 that Amazon could deliver the next day.

Unfortunately, because of the blown pc and the crashing laptop I only had three or four minutes to read the guff and place a next-day order.  I'll probably end up giving this to one of my boys who can make better use of it or keeping it as a last-resort reserve. There's no Adobe to read .pdfs, no photos - simply internet/email and everything is monitored by Google and capability is severely restricted.

The good news is that I managed to find a local pc repair company who picked them up this morning and they've already phoned me twice with updates - that's service.  The laptop could be back as early as Wednesday of this week so I'll let you know how I get on.

Friday, 20 September 2013

A Husband's Point of View

I spotted this in the comments on the Guido Fawkes' blog so thought I'd share it around:

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY (a husband’s point of view)

The missus bought a Paperback,
down Shepton Mallet way,
I had a look inside her bag;
… T’was “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

Well I just left her to it,
And at ten I went to bed.
An hour later she appeared;
The sight filled me with dread…

In her left she held a rope;
And in her right a whip!
She threw them down upon the floor,
And then began to strip.

Well fifty years or so ago;
I might have had a peek;
But Mabel hasn’t weathered well;
She’s eighty four next week!

Watching Mabel bump and grind;
Could not have been much grimmer.
And things then went from bad to worse;
She toppled off her Zimmer!

She struggled back upon her feet;
A couple minutes later;
She put her teeth back in and said
I am a dominater!

Now if you knew our Mabel,
You’d see just why I spluttered,
I’d spent two months in traction
For the last complaint I’d uttered.

She stood there nude and naked
Bent forward just a bit
I went to hold her, sensual like
and stood on her left tit!

Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out;
My god what had I done!?
She moaned and groaned then shouted out:
“Step on the other one”!!

Well readers, I can’t tell no more;
About what occurred that day.
Suffice to say my jet black hair,
Turned fifty shades of grey.
No-one seems to know who composed this so I'll chalk it up to the prolific poet, Anne Onn, and hope she doesn't mind me reproducing it here.

Sunday, 15 September 2013

Sunday Reflection

EU'S latest bloomer! Brussels bid to ban gardeners from buying favourite plants

The definition of insanity: a new proposal from the EU Commission with unforeseen consequences for the British gardener.

EU'S latest bloomer! Brussels bid to ban gardeners from buying favourite iris, lavender and clematis plants (Click link for full story)

I wonder when the British people will actually wake up to the madness of the EU and its encroachment on our way of life and traditional values. David Cameron and his smooth-talking scam about re-negotiation is a disgrace given that re-negotiation isn't a viable proposition without invoking Article 50 of the Lisbon Treaty first. He's a snake oil salesman with the black heart of europhile.
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